Wednesday, December 16, 2009

A poetic tantrum


Fuck. I’ve caught up. No more travel stories. No more muddy pant legs or sweaty scarves or damaged cameras. It’s all over. I’ve got a lease in my hand and a pen that is about to sign my life back into normal-dom. And I don’t wannaaaaaaaa. Somewhere along the way, I got the idea that staying put and having a job and having pets and being ‘normal’ was horrific. So, this pen represents for me a life that I don’t want to live. Ah! What should I do? I was just frolicking among the rubber trees in Laos and now I'm in a sterile cubicle. My synapses are protesting. I'm pounding my feet into the warm Santa Monica ground and screaming and wailing and tantruming more than I did when I was fourteen and calling my mom a bitch. I am in a perfect state of confused chaotic panic that I secretly love because it can only mean a new beginning. In times like these, I can only write a poem, which is weird because I'm not really a poetry kind of girl. Something is seriously amiss.

I saw the world
I wrote a blog
I ate a lot
I pet some hogs

I sweat on trains
I puked up peas
I chased the rains
I switched to teas

I met new friends
I donned new clothes
I gave kids pens
I took some blows

I pet a fish
Saw skirts on men
Some made of pigs
Some made of hens

I had this thing
It defined who I am
Now, very over
And I question again

Back to life
Back to reality
Searching for a word
That rhymes with reality

Back to work
Back to before
This time it’s different
I'm so much more


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6 comments:

A Tale of Midge said...

Oh I love your poem!!!!! You are so talented!

Anonymous said...

that lease better be for a place in chicago... just sayin...

con cariño
karina

Anonymous said...

Mentality rhymes with reality..eh?

laurenne said...

Back to the grind
With an all-new mentality.

How's that, Anonymous critiquer?

Just not as funny.

Ernessa, author of 32 Candles said...

I love the poem, and I really identify with it. I remember coming back to the States after a year and a half abroad. Such a difficult adjustment, but then again, you'd be surprised at how much a place opens up after you've gained new perspective on it.

loving. living. small. said...

the reality rhyming thing reminds me of how there are no true blue foods. no, blueberries don't count.